The Mystery of the Stoney Shoe

So, I’m walking along the street, minding my own business, observing the world as I usually do. Then I feel something sharp under my foot. Great, the noggin says, not another one. 

It’s a stone. In my shoe. Jumping about from toe to toe to ball of foot, mocking me as I try to figure out how it got in there.

See, I don’t just wear shoes – I wear boots. Ankle- or calf-length boots. Ankle hugging boots. But still those suckers find their way inside. Sometimes there’s more than one, sometimes the one stone will bring along a load of friends and they have a party in my shoe.

But the real mystery is where these buggers come from. How do they get in?! Nobody knows! And there’s more… when I tip out my shoe, NOTHING COMES OUT…

The end…

Advertisements

I guess I feel annoyed at my fitness level

So, a couple of weeks ago I started Couch to 5K. I have some thoughts about it…

For a start, I don’t think the creators took into consideration just how unfit people can be when they embark on the journey from their sofa to being able to run. As such, I believe it should be renamed to something along the lines of One Foot in the Grave to 5K. And it should start off much easier than it currently does.

See, the first 3 days involves this – warm up walk for 5 minutes, run for 60 seconds, walk for 90 seconds. Repeat the runs and walks for a total of 8 runs, and the last walk is a cool down.

My body has managed a total of 3 runs at most. Over 4 days. Going by the regime, I should be starting day 2 of the second week, which involves 90 second runs. Yeah, that’s just a tad too much for me…

As a result, I’ve had to restart my excellent progress. I’ve had to wipe the first week simply because I’m not at the fitness level required to move on to week 2. I find it rather unfair. All I’m doing is trying to get my foot out of the grave, and be able to build up my ‘fitness’ level to beyond ‘walking dead’.

In conclusion… For something that’s called Couch to 5K, the developers ignore the fact that not everyone who’s spent years on a sofa can just get up and run for 60 seconds. I had to train myself to be able to run for a fraction of that! I had to train myself over the course of a year and a half to get to the point where I could walk for approximately 3 miles without my legs being on fire or needing to lie down.

*deeeeep breath*